Bisexual people are plain selfish.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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