man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
