u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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