90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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