i barfeds in our rink
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
