i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
tell me about the fingering
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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