And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
that's an acceptable place to lick
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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