So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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