I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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