Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We are all done wearing pants today
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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