why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
