if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
