I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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