i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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