Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
