they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
