it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
