Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
