I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
