I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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