he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Your cock deserves a montage
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
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