and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
