Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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