Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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