I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
