i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
