oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
