If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
