so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
