She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
