I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
