some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I'm passing your future prison.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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