I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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