I need help removing her.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
