omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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