btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize