You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
i think my cat just said my name.
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