It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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