i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
