oh god the rape fog is back!
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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