Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
