worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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