I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
