she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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