Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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