do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
