We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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