No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
My vagina is officially offended.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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