Fine. I'll sleep in my office
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
