Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
