ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize